1. |
PROMISE (INTRO)
00:36
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"PROMISE (INTRO)" - Sleazy C
What would you say if I told you
Nobody really knows me, not even you
But I wanna start being honest and open
So I pull you in close and I say you're the first and only
I've told and I really need you to promise you won't expose me
When I unfold all the secrets of my soul
Would you hold me, console me, tell me I'm not the old me
Say that you can see that I'm cold, broken, and hopeless
But you will do whatever to never let me be lonely
Look into my eyes and can tell I don't know what home is
Then promise me that you'll find a way you could show me?
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2. |
ON MY MIND
02:08
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3. |
FOR THE KIDS
03:04
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"FOR THE KIDS" - Sleazy C
*To anyone who has ever had suicidal thoughts and is listening to this right now, even if you're not listening, I hope somebody tells you that I am so glad you are still here, and I am proud of you. Do not give up. Do not quit. Keep going. You got life to live, do it.*
This is for the kids who lick it, stick it, and flick a Bic
Popping a Xans and probably chain smoking cigs
Wondering why it was you he picked to be made like this
And why you always try but can never seem to fit in with them
You probably feel alone when you're in a crowd
And crowded when you're alone and you just can't figure it out
Why everyone tries to help you but you just can't hear a sound
'Cause the demons inside your mind are bickering too loud
So every night you cocooning up in your room
You smoking the same weed, you stare at the same moon
You thinking the same thoughts, assuming the same doom
Talking up to God like yo I'll be home soon
Don't do it, you got too much living you got to do
And I hope you can see your future is brighter than Georgia Junes
Don't do it, you got living you got to do
So I hope you can see you're worth more than giving up too soon
*Put your hand over your heart right now. You feel that? That's a purpose. That's life. That's your life. That's you. You are amazing. Do not give that up. Do not quit.*
This is for the kids who could never find a place on this earth
To escape the things that chased from birth
So they just bottle it inside until they break and it bursts
And all the dark in them comes to light and it can't be reversed
You've gotten in pretty deep with all the secrets you keep
Trying to hide your emotions but they're sewn to your sleeve
Your mama wants you to stay but you're just itching to leave
'Cause they say home is where your heart is so you live on the street
But you quickly see that your habits only serve to control you
You see that your Pops was right he said it's cold when you're lonely
And if you're not careful son you'll end up broken and hopeless
But it's too little too late, you're alone and you know it
Seven billion people out there and not one of them knows you
They swear it's love in the air but ain't nobody can show you
You think if you throw the towel there's a home you can go to
Your demons want you to quit and if you listen they'll choke you
Don't do it, you got too much living you got to do
And so many dreams you can reach if you fight it like you're supposed to
Don't, You got living you got to do
So I hope you can see you're worth more than giving up too soon
*You know when I started rapping, it was never about the music really. It was just about getting a message out to people like me, who have been broken and who have been lost and never thought that they could be found. And, I just want to let y'all know that there is a brighter tomorrow. Maybe not tomorrow, but eventually that tomorrow will come, and it will be today. And it's all gonna be okay. You just gotta fight through it. And I hope that I'm helping you do that. And if you've made it this far, I am so happy for you, and I am so proud of you.*
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4. |
TAKE ME AWAY
02:48
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"TAKE ME AWAY" - Sleazy C
Dear God, take me away
Take me away to a far away place
A far away place where my mind won't race
A place to escape all the anger and hate inside
I gotta get by, I know my mom's up there seeing me cry
She don't know why, she just want me to fly
I swear to God I'ma try to fly 'til I die
Just 15, I was rolling, smoking potent
Blowing O's I was lonely
So I moved slow motion
Pouring purple potion in a styrofoam cup
Later on when I got a little grown up
Long-lost father finally showed up
So what, I slammed that door shut,
F*** that bulls***, feel like I'ma throw up
But I roll up, take it to the dome
And I'd get so stoned can't feel my toes up
Take a nap 'til I'm happy again
Would've been nice if I had me a friend
Tough tits all I had was a pad and a pen
Writing this 'til I passed out again
Dear God, take me away
Take me away to a far away place
A far away place where my mind won't race
A place to escape all the anger and hate inside
I gotta get by, I know my mom's up there seeing me cry
She don't know why, she just want me to fly
I swear to God I'ma try to fly 'til I die
Picture me at 16, borderline suicidal
By 18 couldn't sleep without a knife and a Bible
Right beside me
On the nightstand with a bottle of whiskey
It always seemed to be empty
And if it wasn't then I turned the bottom up
And put the whole fifth in me swiftly
Drowning the evil that lives within me
Pounding inside my head attempting to tempt me
I wish I could live simply
But this sin is so tempting
And I'm ashamed to say
When I look in the mirror, all I see is the face of pain
Long-lost innocence fades away
Scratch that, straight black, no shades of gray
And I try to justify the mistakes I've made by saying hey
At least I'm getting paid or it's not my fault, I was made this way
Bulls*** that's a cop-out call me on it
And if you can hear me I'm saying I'm sorry mama
For all the times that I led you to believe I was clean when I wasn't
But f*** it I'm sick to my stomach
Sick of hearing a single drip drop in the bucket
Sick of trying to tell myself my cup runneth over
Sick of this f***ing chip on my shoulder
I gotta get it off, gotta get gone
Gotta stop sleeping with the lights still on
I gotta embrace the pain, embrace the shame
And stop letting dark thoughts penetrate my brain
Dear God, take me away
Take me away to a far away place
A far away place where my mind won't race
A place to escape all the anger and hate inside
I gotta get by, I know my mom's up there seeing me cry
She don't know why, she just want me to fly
I swear to God I'ma try to fly 'til I die
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5. |
LEAVE ME
03:33
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"LEAVE ME" - Sleazy C
Looking for some peace of mind
Starving and I just need a piece of pie
Not much but I know a little piece is mine
And yeah the preacher teaches let go and let Jesus I'm
Just tired of hearing about the Bible
What's the use if you gotta read between the lines
I know you gotta seek to find
But I would rather seek peace in the deepest rhymes
Don't. Give. Up. Please.
I. Will. Find. Peace.
Won't you let me go
Leave me with the moon
I'm better off alone
I'll come back to you soon
Please don't say you'll pray
Save it for the weak
I know I'll be okay
My dreams will set me free
Won't you let me go
Leave me with the moon
I'm better off alone
I'll come back to you soon
Tell me that you'll wait
Patiently for me
Someday and some way
My dreams will set me free
I. Will. Find. Peace.
Don't. Give. Up. Please.
Wish I could escape this place
Stuck at the bottom I'm in a race with fate
It's too late, already misplaced the hate
Addicted to addiction and I always seem to take the bait
Look in the mirror and see the face of pain
What a waste, I'm living at a dangerous pace
I smile just to save some face
But I would rather save me, please make some space
Won't you let me go
Leave me with the moon
I'm better off alone
I'll come back to you soon
Please don't say you'll pray
Save it for the weak
I know I'll be okay
My dreams will set me free
Won't you let me go
Leave me with the moon
I'm better off alone
I'll come back to you soon
Tell me that you'll wait
Patiently for me
Someday and some way
My dreams will set me free
Don't. Give. Up. Please. Wait. For. Me.
I. Will. Find. Peace. In. My. Dreams.
I just wanna sleep at night
I lied when I told you I've been sleeping fine
It ain't right, but you don't need to see my fight
Sleep tight, give time, and I promise I'ma be alright
Got a dark mind, but my dreams are bright
It's a hike, I got a steep flight to climb
I hope that you'll be by my side when I arrive
Please say you're gonna wait while I'm
Looking for some peace of mind
Starving and I just need a piece of pie
Not much but I know a little piece is mine
And yeah the preacher teaches let go and let Jesus I'm
Just tired of hearing about the Bible
What's the use if you gotta read between the lines
I know you gotta seek to find
But I would rather seek peace in the deepest rhymes
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6. |
WEDNESDAYS
02:54
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"WEDNESDAYS" - Sleazy C
*Um, so Colton how's it going? Um, it's been a while since we last met. Did you, uh, work on your anger exercises that I suggested. I hope you did, 'cause I'm concerned about your lack of progress. It's a shame to see such a young man be so stressed. Um, but anyway, tell me about your week. Are you doing okay? Colton? You gotta help me help you. You doing okay? What do you got to say?*
Imagine the image that was burned in my mind
While I was staring into my mother's lifeless eyes
Gripping her hand so tight, tryna hold on
Begging her not to go, mama please be strong!
But it wasn't her decision, she had no choice
All I wanted was a chance to hear the sound of her voice
But you wouldn't understand what the f*** it was like
To stare blankly at the Angel who gave you life
As she's fighting the fight, not a thing you can do
You can barely even stomach being in the same room
But you know you gotta be there for moral support
'Cause she was young when she had you but she didn't abort (Oh my)
Always been her biggest fan and you love her to pieces
But the cancer's got you thinking maybe there ain't a Jesus
You put it all aside 'cause it ain't about you
Now it's time to be a man so what the f*** would you do (idk, idk)
Knelt down slow and grabbed her by the hand I said mama I love you, I don't want you to go
But I know it's in His plans and I know that I'll grow
Into a man that'll always try to make you proud
And I'm sorry for all the time I let you down
You're amazing pretty lady, don't you ever forget it
Save me a seat up there, someday I'll get to be in it
*Well, you're right. I can't relate. I've never been through that.*
Then I had to let her go, she took her last breath
And I watched my mother's soul rise out of her chest
So now can you imagine the s*** I've been through
That's what I thought, let me know when it happens to you
But I thank God for granting me that moment of clarity
And showing me I don't need nobody to carry me
I'll walk the path alone on my own two feet
Until I make it to the gates and we can finally meet
But don't be confused by my scripture tattoos
I'm a God-fearing man but I got nothing to lose
So you better pray you're not there the day that I blow
'Cause this anger and hate in me has steadily grown
Just a little bit colder and a lot more bolder
I'm itching to ease the pain of this chip on my shoulder
So I'm begging you please come test me I dare you
(Okay calm down, calm down now)
But don't be confused when I erupt in hysterics
I won't spare you, I swear to you you're nothing to me
I don't need your little mind games or s***ty psychology
(Agh, well I..)
Don't even bother, it's too late for apologies
My future is in the stars if you believe in astrology
Read it and weep, I'm a lost cause plain to see
The fallen angel's gotten his grimy hands on me
I'm fighting a losing battle with an army of one
So how does that sound, you think my exercises are done?
*Well then, um... I think we're gonna need to go ahead and schedule another appointment for you. Um... wow. Wow.*
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7. |
YOU DON'T KNOW
01:35
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"YOU DON'T KNOW" - Sleazy C
I bet you didn't know it, my lyrical flow is potent
'Cause I just began to show that my rhymes are forever flowing
My mind is a tree that's growing, words are the seeds I'm sowing
Into the ground that's eroding from under me 'til I'm going
Insane and barely floating, but currently I am rowing
My boat, I'm opposed to choking so I'm beginning to cope and it's more than just smoking dope
Used to sit alone in the darkness with the All-Knowing
I begged him to show me hope and was hoping my heart was growing
Getting stoned alone, I was smoking and paper-rolling
Had downers to keep me grounded and all that I had was stolen
I was broken. Now I'm proven tried and true
Writing songs about it just to f***ing spite you
You doubted me then, but quietly I smiled at you
Kept my mouth shut, taking in the fighting fuel
So I could feed into it when I needed to
It gave me reason to sink my f***ing teeth into
this f***ing weak excuse for an industry
desperately in need of me
I'm rap's game changer, call me the track slayer
My voice giving you chills, you're thinking I'm rap's savior
Ink on the paper's a hell of a combination
Creating sensation like audible masturbation
Through mastication I'm making your doubt into motivation
Got you praying to God I don't reach my destination
Face it, I'm making it through the forest of haters
And you didn't leave a trail so mother f***er I'm blazing it
Got the money, I'll take it slap you in the face
With a mixtape and laugh 'cause even your mom is playing this
You're hating this, but what can I say I'm baiting this hook
No chorus, so I cast into the verse
Murdering beats, putting my brother's work in a hearse
F*** your self-esteem, I'll rape it and make it hurt
'Cause you were hating on me first, so I really hope that you learn
I will get to the top and until then I am not stopping
'Cause the bottom had me rotting from robbing and petty plotting
Haters proceed with caution when questioning my potential
'Cause you don't mean s*** to me just in case I forgot to mention
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8. |
THE UGLY TRUTH
02:09
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"THE UGLY TRUTH" - Sleazy C
Don't call me Colton if you just call when you need me
If you weren't there when I starved then you must be looking for Sleazy
This is he. Speaking, currently kinda busy
I'll get back to you whenever I figure out how I'm eating
Or I won't. Don't worry just carry on with your feasting
It's too late to love me now so don't talk to me when you see me
Told you that I would make it, promised you they would king me
I spent so much time and energy tryna make you believe me!
F*** it! I never back down from a single challenge
I'm glad you tested my passion, hope you're listening now
So you see the birth of a mogul, want you to witness how
I turn natty in f***ing plastic to bubbly in a chalice
Remember back when I'd pop a couple of tabs
Smoke a blunt and flick the ash on the dash of my s***ty Acura
Sit back and laugh like a psychopathic disaster
Deciding if I should crash it or try to fight it and fasten up
Darkest days of my life and you let it pass
The chance to be f***ing homies and help me to get up out the dust
Now I'm not mad I don't want your pity or cash
Saying if you were me I would be the first one to show you love
That's the,ugly truth
I would hate if I made myself even uglier just to f*** with you
Coming at the rap game head first
And I'll be beating on my chest until my mother f***ing legs hurt
You think Im stopping I'll be dead first
Georgia bred so I'm stomping my message into this red dirt
Say I'm off my rocker for thinking I'll see the top
I'll remind you that even 'Pac was a kernel before he Reddenbachered
B**** drop it I'm sick of this silly argument
Between me and these kids it's obvious who the hardest is
I'm on top of s*** passionate with the art
If the topic is who's next, Sleazy is calling dibs
Love it or hate it, ain't gon' stop me from getting famous
If you missed the train then it's all on you 'cause you hesitated
I'm at the head of table, made my reservation
If your name ain't on the list, I guess you don't get a plate b****
Don't call me Colton if you just call when you need me
If you weren't there when I starved then you must be looking for Sleazy
This is he. Speaking. Currently kinda busy
I'll get back to you whenever I figure out how I'm eating
(No I won't)
That's the ugly f***ing truth
I would hate if I made myself even uglier just to f*** with you
Thats the ugly f***ing truth
So don't come at me like we're cool all I got for you is a F*** YOU
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9. |
I KNOW
01:52
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"I KNOW" - Sleazy C
Whatcha know about this, whatcha know about that
Everybody wanna know what I know about rapping like
Whatcha know about the trap, whatcha know about walking the streets in all black
You right, that ain't me
I been busy working on a college degree
And meanwhile getting paid so it's plain to see
I'm on the come up and you can't say a thing to me
You sound lame to me, you mother f***ers cant hang
Real recognize real and you looking like a fake to me
I'm not a critic but what I'm saying is critical
I'm not a lawyer so what I'm saying is literal
It's more than metaphorical, nothing here is rhetorical
I really need an answer 'cause what I'm hearing is pitiful
Rap b***ards selling out for plaques
And telling kids it's all about getting and flipping packs like
Yeah yeah it's all about that white s***
Whatever happened to rapping that real life s***
When you gonna put down the drugs and guns
Pick up a pen and get back to business and killing 'em with the mic
Im Sleazy, f*** classy
Never really been about trying to be flashy
No whips, no chains, no ice, no gold, no h**s, and really got no cash
I been working to make ends meet
Speaking from the heart and you won't hear me embellish it
I'm a grown a** man you won't see me pretending
Every line I write is fire so I reckon I'm devilish
Straight out of Weatherford where money's the devil
And then I came out to Gwinnett where everything is for sale and it's
A damn shame everybody got game
Everybody got change and everybody is famous
F*** that, Im bringing classic back
Where you come up from the bottom and struggle through that sadness
Flip on the mic and hit 'em with that madness
Spit truth, uncut, no padding
I'm a starving artist and I'm hardly started
My hunger is deep but the sea is parting
I don't want a hit of nothing, no lean or marley
I've been working nonstop, no time to party
So whatcha know about that
White boy, clean piss on the track
Saving the game, making a change, and bringing real s*** back
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10. |
MONEY MONEY
03:12
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"MONEY MONEY" - Sleazy C
Make money, money don't make you (6x)
Make money and give it back to the world 'cause the world makes money, money don't make you
Mama said baby you gon' make it I know it
You got a lot of drive I can tell you know where you're going
My only hope is when you get it play it cool don't blow it
Remember you cannot take anything with you when you go
(Yap!)
Mama thanks I'm living by that daily
Steady getting paid I promise it won't change me
When I'm on top people might praise me
But they gon' see a good man like you raised me
Counting change I'ma make changes too
First I gotta break through to the youth
And the method of delivery I choose is music
Make way, 'cause ya boy's coming through with the truth
I seen, too many people get paid and lose it
Go crazy, blow a couple racks on shoes
New crib, new whip, and a chain or two
I got news for you and I suggest you write it down too
Your word is all that you got is what it comes down to
Gotta be honest and stay loyal to fam too
Be strong, don't break, work hard, make money, but remember that it don't make you
Make money, money don't make you (6x)
Make money and give it back to the world 'cause the world makes money, money don't make you
Some day, I'ma be rich and I know it
I been working like a dog rain, sleet, hail, snow
Patiently waiting until I know it's my moment
My brother made beats, told me hit the gas, and I'm gone
(Yap!)
First tape was All In A Day
Now I'm tryna make it go global I'l be home for the holidays
Just playing, I'm leaving that to the lames
I'm a family man my homebase I'ma never stray
Pops told me no matter where you go or what you're doing, you can always come home bro we love you
In return I promised him I'ma dream big, make money but I will never put that above you
Anyway I need to stay on track
'Cause time is money it's ironic I'm talking about that
Coming from a trailer, mama cooking weenies and mac
The whole fam seen hell but we all came back
(Uh!)
Same dude ain't a damn thing changed
No thug but I'll kill for my brothers if y'all make me
Only hard when I gotta be, still soft, love deep, making the time for my lady
You on that weak s***, you call it G s***
Big bad no love in the street s***
Maybe it's me but, if that's all they're selling in the rap game these days y'all can keep it
For me more it's than just getting the cream
I'm sure you hear a lot of talking, don't know what to believe
We in the same place I'm just telling you what I see
I'm down for making some money but money won't make me
Make money, money don't make you (6x)
Make money and give it back to the world 'cause the world makes money, money don't make you
Mama said baby you gon' make it I know it
You got a lot of drive I can tell you know where you're going
My only hope is when you get it play it cool don't blow it
Remember you cannot take anything with you when you go
Mama thanks I'm living by that daily
Steady getting paid I promise it won't change me
When I'm on top people might praise me
But they gon' see a good man like you raised me
Make money, money don't make you
Make money, money don't make you
...
Make money, money don't make you
Make money, money don't make you
Make money and give it back to the world 'cause the world makes money, money don't make you
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11. |
SET ME FREE (OUTRO)
00:31
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"SET ME FREE (OUTRO)" - Sleazy C
Lately I've been..
Rock solid, I need a minute to thaw me out
Take a walk, maybe me and God can just talk it out
I feel like every time I come and go he locks me out
Maybe 'cause I failed to exemplify what I talk about
My friends look up to me but don't know what they're looking at
'Cause I put up walls and think I'm ugly so I wear a mask
To hide the pain and the shame that comes with making a change
But I'm feeling torn 'cause I know that I wouldn't change a thing
Now I'm not perfect and I'm not aiming to be
I'm just saying I think it's time I put the past away and set me free
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